By Emma Straub
This book is about a family that is comprised of…mostly adults. If we are considering age only, because mentally – well, we all have our days. The book centers on sixty-eight year old Astrid Strick, who reevaluates her life priorities after seeing an acquaintance of hers get hit by a school bus as she crosses the street in front of her. This was a compelling read about daily life. Straub is able to keep our interest through a topic that could become mundane and trivial.
Astrid sets about trying to live in the moment, ask the right questions, and stop waiting to act. She apologies to her three, now grown, children for various injustices she believes she made against them over the years, and has the since to apologize for what they perceive was done to them as well. Often they are not the same thing. From that place of growth and healing, we see Elliott, Porter, and Nicky start to change the way they parent and exist in the world.
Freed from constraint, Astrid also comes to terms with and lives the truth of her sexuality, with mixed reception. Her partner, Birdie, becomes a favorite character quickly. Another character also struggles with identity and sexuality throughout the book that will break your heart as she stumbles, but leave you with hope as she soars at the end.
Parenting and its difficulties are explored over two generations in the book. I think what is important is that every parent tries their best genuinely. Some characters lose sight of that, but either self-realize or have someone point it out and are able to correct their course. As long as parents keep trying to do their best, children (mostly) turn out alright and (sometimes) return their love. Is it enough to do their best at parenting? Should they also be trying to be their best self as an example? What is the determination for what is best? Who decides success?
Pros & Cons & Potential Spoilers
Pros
- My favorite chapter is “Wendy Wakes Up”, because I was getting very mad at her husband and his behavior, but she stands up for who and what she is – so happy!
- Cecelia is also a great character, again standing up for what is right, even when adults are slow on the uptake around her
- A family is healed
Cons
- The serial cheater does NOT get punched in the face when he is supposed to
- The evil prom queen/cheerleader/Pink does NOT learn her lesson in any of her iterations over the generations
- We never figure out what goes in the empty building space